


My Mayhem

by from_afar



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: Car Accidents, Depression, Drinking, F/F, Minor Character Death, Slow Burn, Tobin making stupid decisions, discontinued
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-22
Updated: 2016-08-22
Packaged: 2018-08-10 07:03:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7834873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/from_afar/pseuds/from_afar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tobin was in a car accident about six months back. She and Alex were on their way to the beach when a drunk driver hit them, killing Alex. Tobin can't bring herself to care about anything anymore, besides surfing and going to the bar. Then, Christen enters the picture, and something keeps pushing the two together.</p><p>--------------------------------------------------</p><p>This story has been discontinued. I'm sorry guys I just don't have the time between work and school.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Mayhem

**Author's Note:**

> Tobin's thoughts and flashbacks are in italics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a thought I had for a story, let me know if i should write more or not!

 

My fingers played with the wind whipping outside my car. Moving up and down until everything else was tuned out except for the motion of my hand. 

The beach was the only place I wanted to go right now. And maybe the bar, but as of right now Kelley didn't know that.

Today was the first time I could bring myself back to driving. Kelley was usually the one to drop me near the surf early in the morning while I would walk home late at night, but after she got a new job I was on my own.

And like I was going to spend time alone in that house. God, I couldn't even bring myself to take the fucking pictures off the wall. I can't tell yet if they would make me feel worse taken down or hanging there.

 My eyes were already hazy. Other locals stared at me when I messily parked the car, only to jump out, sit on the curb and take deep breaths. I was past wondering what other people were thinking of me at this point. I know they've all seen the papers. The headline stories filled with bullshit.

I grab my board out of the trunk and drag my feet through the gravel. Kicking whatever rocks were in the way, swaying as I walked. I probably looked drunk. I chuckle to myself knowing that wasn't nearly the case yet.

Throwing the surfboard into the sand I take a good look at the surf today. _Shit shit shit._ My head starts to pound. I slide as slow as I can to but still end up hitting the ground pretty hard. The pounding gets worse until I pull my knees up to put my head in between them.

 

_My head was pounding. Things were too white. An unnatural white. My closed eyes squeezed tighter together._

_My arms felt so heavy. The oxygen around my nose felt suffocating, which I'm positive was the opposite of the one job it had to do. The beeping around me was getting increasingly annoying the longer I squeezed my eyes together, but the light was hurting my head more than the stupid noise._  

_The door opened. Opening my eyes as small as I could I saw blobs of color dotting the room. As I got used to it I opened them farther until I could make things out. Flowers. Cards. Balloons. Every table in the room was filled with some sort of gift and I couldn't remember why._

_Kelley’s moment turned my head to the left. She shuffled around, setting down her back, shoving flowers to the side to make room for herself. I breathed heavily to get her attention._

_“Hey tobs.” She stroked my hair. Noticing she was carefully staying away from the left side of my head, so I slowly raise my arm. A bandage around the size of my hand covered my ear to my left temple. So that's where the pounding was coming from._

_“You're going to have one hell of a scar there.” Kelley was smiling. I don’t understand._

 

I traced the scar on the side of my head. Feeling the shaved bits prickle my fingertips. Tracing the outline of it calmed me down. Maybe because it felt like validation she did quite suffer alone.

Enough of this. Pulling my wetsuit, not bothering to zip it up, I picked up the board and got into the water. 

What little energy I had these days went right into surfing. I didn’t feel much these days except anger, but pushing myself past what I knew i should be doing had taken a toll on my body. I’d dropped two sizes since the accident. If I pulled my shirt up, you could clearly see the outline of my ribs. My hips jutted outwards, my bones felt like they were trying to escape.

I paddled until my arms burned, and then paddled more. Checking my watch, it was only mid-day and there was no way I was going to start back yet. I laid face up with my feet on the nose of my board near the shallows where the waves were little. Crossing my arms behind my head, I turned my face toward the sun. Feeling the heat warm the cold droplets splattered across my face.

 

* * *

 

 I must’ve fallen asleep. I’d gone from lying on my board to inhaling salt water through my nose as I fell face first deeper into the water. My board must have drifted from the shallow water to the deeper parts near the reef.   

Opening my eyes was a bad decision, not because of the burn, but because of the larger reef rock directly in my path. I shut them tightly while thrusting my arms out. One grabbed a handful of sand while the other was slashed on something growing on the rock, probably a coral. That did nothing to help the impact of my head as I smashed into it. 

My hand went to my right temple. That warm stuff was definitely blood, and I was definitely feeling pain. 

My ankle attached to my board was holding me back from swimming upwards. I was tangled in the rope holding me. Holding my breath is getting harder every second. I struggled in the water, flopping around until I felt the Velcro on my ankle. Ripping it off, my feet found purchase at the bottom and I rocketed myself upwards.

I had never breathed this heavily in my life. My board was close enough to pull myself halfway on. I slapped my hand on it in anger, forgetting I had cut it on the reef. “FUCK!”

I threw my board as far as I could at the moment while I slumped to the ground, face in the sand.

I watched the sand fall through my fingers as I picked it up. _I’m so tired._

“Are you okay?”

 _Shit… now I’m hearing things._  

“Hello?”

 _Okay no that definitely was someone._ I lifted my head, sand stuck the right side of my face, only giving me one eye to see with.

No one was the left. I turn to the right. _Okay that’s definitely a person._ The sun blocked my vision from seeing anything but a black shadow where someone was apparently.

“Oh my god!” 

 _Okay it was girl, and now she’s touching my face, what the hell._  Her hand brushing the sand away from the right side of my face, came away bloody. I groaned.

“What happened!?”

 _God she asks a lot of questions._ “I’m fine.”

I know it came out harsh but I don’t really care. Now that I could see her face, I could make out the worry and confusion.

She nodded her head and quickly turned around. I dropped my head back in the sand as I watched her walk away. She must’ve only gotten around four stepped before she sharply turned around, pointing her finger at me.

“You know what? You’re not fine and I’m not having this on my conscience so get the fuck up.”

_Goddamn. Alright, fine._

I pick myself up, slowly. My feet feel strange and I shake my head, trying to get rid of the spinning.

Her arm grabs my side and I’m too weak to push this stranger away.

 _She’s so warm._  

I feel like I could actually curl up to the side of this girl, but I remind myself that that’s fucking weird and I don’t know her. 

 

* * *

 

The stranger sets her hand on top of my bouncing knee. After arriving at the hospital in her beat up pickup truck, I told her she could go now, but she was adamantly refusing.

Some nurse had set a gown for me to change into on the side of my bed, but both were untouched as of right now. I would rather be sitting on a chair to the side of the room, next to this stranger than in that bed.

I fucking hated hospitals. My release had only been around four months ago, but after staying in one for almost six weeks made me hate all hospitals. 

The door opened. “Hello ladies. So what’s going on?”

This doctor had to have been the most basic looking white male I’ve ever seen. His presence already annoyed me. 

The girl next to me opened her mouth to speak about what happened, but I beat her to it.

“Surfing accident.”

 

Halfway through the stiches on my hand, Kelley finally showed up. Running into the room, panting as if someone was actually dying.

“Are you okay?”

I nodded, somewhat cracking a smile at her state.

The sutures continued, unnoticed by me as I looked around the room, bored.

Finally whatever this mans name was spoke up. “All right you’re all set. A nurse will be in shortly to check you out.”

I nodded my head to him while the other two both murmured thank you’s. 

Kelley spoke up as soon as the door was fully closed. “Tobin what the hell is going on?”

My jaw clenched. My eyes were watering. _Goddamn it._ I ran my fingers through my hair, trying to push the strands out my face while I took deep breaths to calm myself down. 

“Okay well… I guess I should be going.” _I’d forgotten the other girl was even there._

Kelley smiled at her. “Thank you for all of your help…?”

“Christen.”

“Thank you Christen.”

And with that, Christen gave me a nod and left.

  
  



End file.
